Came across this headline this morning:
Clorox offers $5K to wipe out SF ‘toilet torcher’
SAN FRANCISCO – The Clorox Company is offering a $5,000 reward and a year’s supply of toilet cleaning products for tips leading to the arrest of San Francisco‘s notorious portable potty pyromaniac. [read full story]
Clorox thinks this is simple arson. Well, I got the tinfoil hat out and have developed an alternate theory. I’m concerned that there is some poor construction worker out there with exothermically reactive poop. He’s forced to wander the earth (like Cane from Kung Fu or David Banner) from construction site to construction site until nature unleashes its horrific call torching yet another port-a-potty.
Hazmat teams should be deployed immediately to locate this sad individual and attempt to harness his less than heroic super power for good.
Update: It’s all coming together. I wonder if she’s had any construction workers lingering around her pipes….
Colorado woman with flammable water fears blast
FORT LUPTON, Colo. – A woman said she lives in constant fear and is terrified her home could blow up …Amee Ellsworth can turn on a faucet in her kitchen or bathroom, flick a lighter and watch flames shoot up from the sink. And Ellsworth said she’s afraid she or her neighbors are at imminent risk of an explosion. [read full story]
Maybe if America learns to do this we can get out of the recession
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finally a post about poo that is not about green poo! lets see the odd search results start now!
The web is full of rabbit holes and this is one of the weirder ones I’ve come across in a while. Here’s the process. Try it at home!
1) Go google.com
2) Type in “Why is” but don’t hit the search button. This will generate a set of suggested searches based on popularity of searching on google. This is where things get crazy. The third most popular search term is “Why is my poop green”. Seriously. Here’s a screen shot.
3) So I had to check out what sort of magnificence waited behind the “why is my poop green” search.
4) PoopReport.com?!?! Your one stop source for stories of unbelievable poops and, something new to me, “poop terrorism”. Behold the glory of their logo.
Thank you google for broadening horizons.
