A while back I posted about an interesting Google discovery. If you start a question with “Why is”, one of the first suggested searches from Google is “Why is my poop green?” Since that first post, I’ve been steadily getting search traffic from folks apparently afflicted with polychromatic poo asking some form of that question. It seemed that more research was in order.
Green poop seems to be a relatively new phenomenon. Check out the Google Trends for searches of “Why is my poop green?”
While it seems to have been a mild issue since 2004, something really hit its stride mid-2008. What is adversely affecting America’s poop? After exhaustive research (20 minutes this morning), I have some theories related to major events around that time:
- Barack Obama secured the Democratic presidential nomination. I am well aware from watching a lot of TV that the presence of a black president is a clear indication that a show is set in the future. Since we’re all living in the future, some poop discoloration shouldn’t be too surprising.
- Bill Gates stepped out of day to day operations at Microsoft. Green poop may be the biological equivalent of the blue screen of death.
- Lucky Charms increased it’s leprechaun content 40%.
- The bottom dropped out of the economy. Perhaps economic uncertainty manifests itself as poop in the hues of spring. It’s also possible that the $700 billion “bailout” consists of surreptitiously grinding up money and hiding it in Kraft cheese.
So there you go. Hopefully our lower intestines will not spin the color wheel again.
Apparently all the money in the world can’t buy you a good ad campaign. Microsoft has been on having a great run of ill conceived marketing for the last year or so. For the life of me, I can’t imagine what they’re doing. The overarching theme of it all seems to be “We are out of touch.” Good job, guys. That will help sell some software.
Here’s their first stab at it. Jerry Seinfeld, America’s most relevant comedian after several years of being off the air, returns to help Bill Gates realize he’s lost touch with the common man.
But this Songsmith one makes the Circus Shoes thing seem like a brilliant concept. TechCrunch did us all a solid by catching it. How do I begin to explain the awfulness of this video? Should I start with the fact that it’s a software that runs only on Windows being used on a Mac in the video with some strategically placed stickers? Maybe I’m so irked because somebody in the marketing group obviously said, “Hey, this totally helps you make up jingles! That’s something everybody has to deal with every day!!” Prepare to be amazed at the amazing waste of bits that is THE SONGSMITH PROMO!
