You’ve got spam!

On July 16, 2009, in Tragically lame, by Steve

I took a peek in my spam folder this morning and there’s some great stuff in there.  The spammers seem to have cornered the market on hyperbole and euphamisms.  A selection of the awesomeness:

  • Get real mofo in pants – I’m not sure if this is a good thing.  Is the mofo in my pants with me, or did they take my pants?
  • Make you man’s carrot grow – Spam has moved into the lucrative agribusiness sector. I wonder if they can make your man’s wheat and soy beans grow.
  • Make your love rod strong like a buffalo and ram her good – The love rods used to roam in mighty waves across the plains.  Only now are their herds recovering.

These next ones make no real sense:

  • Followed by bacterial infections? Try Amoxicillin. – Where the hell did this one come from?
  • Emma Watson got fungi - What does this even mean?!?
  • Where’s Stan? – No idea.  I miss him.

Here’s College Humor’s take on if spammers wrote the Cialis commercial.

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