Here at Please Wash Hands, we have a standing rule against hairy men in thongs. Wiley and I discussed it thoroughly at the site’s inception and drew a hard line. Mr. Dunn has forced us to violate that most sacred of rules.
Take a moment to let these burn into your brain. He’s almost hypnotic if you look too long. Scarred for life? Good. Now let’s discuss some of the interesting observations and inferences we can make from the photos.
- He likes guns. He has 8 of them by my count. The next time you defend the second ammendment, Mr. Heston (I know he’s dead but I’m not sure who runs the NRA these days), remember this is the guy your defending.
- Going bald apparently is localized only to the cranial region and does not impact overall hair growth.
- Man is, in fact, descended from apes (or at least hairier men).
- Not all hobbits are cute
- He doesn’t seem to understand that two leather belts do not a bandolier make. Although, his reasons for opting for something other than duct tape are obvious.
- Perhaps most troubling is the guitars. They aren’t real guitars. They’re controllers for Guitar Hero. (Hey Activision guys, your target market has no pants!)
So there you go. Something horrific for your Thursday morning.
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